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today i am very thankful for the 4 mile walk i took, i-pod blasting techno tunes. and a very hot bath. a fantastic homemade tuna salad with a freshly baked potato. also the guy from the wine store who i always chat up gave me a free bottle of wine for thanksgiving. while waiting impatiently at the stop light i noticed a car pulled over under the viaduct where a group of 5 or 6 homeless hippie folks gather. the person in the car seemed to giving out supplies n' such (and if they weren't then i value my imagination and hope for the best.) i have a part-time job. i have two adorable cats. my car works. i have chocolate in the house. i just 'hulu-ed' an episode of the 'office'. i'll be making incredible cheesecake later for thanksgiving and i might just take a nap. i just created a new website. i wrote some pages on my film. i read and rewrote some lines in an odd story i've started. the word Joy keeps haunting me. i realized today that i have enough money t...

for the love of mike i keep hearing that term and wondering, ‘what the HEY!’ that’s almost as antiquated as blackguard, (that’s blag-gard), you know, some sort of scoundrel. i’m seeing a pirate with an eye-patch, some snaggled-toothed buzzard with really dirty fingernails and quite possibly eyeliner...oh, that’s Keith Richards. Just kidding Keith, keep up the good work! Or of the three eggs needed to add to your cake mix there’s that one persistently evading the craa-ck-rolling off into some dark corner- that’s rogue, no? I digress. Check out the book, “Taxi Driver Wisdom” , where we get our quote for the day....”the things you love are as stupid as the things you hate and are easily interchangeable.”

ok. i’ve had my first complaint from a friend, natch. he thinks while in tennessee i was body-snatched and replaced with some zen-space-age-crystal-sniffin’-beatnik. the point being: i’ve gone all fluffy. maybe maybe, not likely, for those who know me. but chew on this awhile. what if it doesn’t take muscle to get through life? what if while you (and I) keep doing the same dog-turn through life looking for a place to lie down you get a little dizzy, start knocking things over and pretty soon you’ve gone stark-raving bonkers? see, in a.a. (alcoholics anonymous, no affiliation) they describe madness or kra-zee as exactly that, taking the same action/attitude over and over and expecting a different result. all i’m saying is give ‘ease’ a chance. take swimming for example. i swam for years muscling through the water, it may not have looked like it but you know when your body reaches a plateau, you don’t get better and you’re not going faster. then i stumbled across Total Immersion a ...

ok, so it’s not what any of us was expecting. but it’s all good, BECAUSE what we’re looking at here is sky and water. you thought you we’re donning your swim suit, trimming up the leg hair, slathering on a little coconut oil and baking under a red-hot sun. but what we’re seeing here is anticipation, the hope of spring and a green green summer. i’ll play docent, you play the eager fan. ‘ladies and gentlemen, please notice the formation of snow and the slushy green-tea-ice-effect in the water. observe the subtle color variation between the teal water horizon and it’s friend sky, a shy mauve.’ See. don’t you feel better already? between the ‘ooohs’ and ‘ahhhs’, you’ve just begun breathing and we’ll make it through another- shall we say- cool march day.

yeah, i’m not going to pretend i wouldn’t rather be there than here at this bloody grey moment. that was christmas 2007, a beautiful gift to me. that’s the thing i’m learning, “i am where i am.” check out ‘ the astonishing power of emotions ’ , by esther and jerry hicks. ok i admit it’s part and parcel of ‘the secret’ which is not my usual bag of tricks but if the shoe fits, i say. See, i’m in a big hurry per uge (that’s you-jeh)...to get to where i want to be NOW, instead the hope is to ‘float downstream’ towards the desire..all in good time my friend, all in good time. life changes may be likened to the the ‘ slow food ’ movement, start with great ingredients, simmer, plus patience=time results in a most miraculous stew, life stew. and it can’t hurt to add a glass of wine (or two). that’s my hope for today, working on the stew and the wine. kisses all around.

today is the very first day of my very first blog and there will be more more more. you are looking at a photo taken atop lookout mtn in chattanooga, tennessee at sunset rock- a favourite jumping off spot for climbers, not jumpers- although i’m sure there have been jumpers . that’s a little morbid and that’s not where we’re going. we’re going up up up to the things, places , music, and people that take us higher and higher. so hang on the ride may be bumpy, but you asked for a ride, no?

sorry folks i've been remiss. okay i'm not sorry. i've been (re)building my life and that takes time and effort but i'm back on the page committed to me and therefore you. meet me at: anagoes.net

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like manna that falls daily, to be gathered daily, not stored, not hoarded. scoop and eat. eat it with your hands, mix it with cows milk for cereal, smash it into patties fried in oil, snort it smoke it devour it. it is a limited concept when you think about it. you can understand why the israelites got a little greedy, trying to plan ahead for your dinner guests. i mean and the kids, they need to be fed early and often. but no, if you store it it goes foul and maggoty. and grumpy. who wants to eats toasted honey oats everyday, three times a day for eternity? and then jesus taught his disciples to pray..." our father ...give us this day our daily bread..." i think of the monk's begging bowl filled, whether the tide comes or goes...and my friend gina who, also a freelancer, confessed to napping when she's under-employed, "some days longer than others." she naps because not only are the days long but the agony of 'defeat' is great and rather than fl...

well thinking, not smoking, i gave that up years ago although our new president has not...he'll be sneaking out to the rose garden to cop a drag, smearing out the butts with his long-toed shoes. everyone knows now so get over it. there's something almost endearing about it,..."shhhh, the messiah smokes." (tongue in cheeks folks tongue in cheek...) so as a part of my temp-job i've been making phone calls all week to various medical offices around the country. that's fun, or very near fun, particularly reaching the woman from the landscaping business who complained that the previous owner of her new number never bothered to inform their patients that they'd moved. i made a call to my insurance company recently and heard, " Harvard University " on the other end. "ah geez, i'm sorry." " Are you attempting to contact Acme Insurance?" " Indeed i am ma'am." "We're 5992, they're 5982, try it again, it...

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i have no idea what today is about except the cable man returned to update my modem as i was getting no signal sometimes for hours and how does that look for an aspiring blogger? i've been suspicious all along but i did read a Guardian article regarding Facebook, it's pros and cons. One con is feeling attached to people whilst sitting alone drinking all evening in a room before your computer screen "communicating' with your "friends". recently on " this i believe ' was a story of an american ex-pat, Jim Haynes , who has lived in Paris 30 odd years and made it his habit every sunday to host a dinner to which anyone is invited. isn't that a great way to meet people for real? i'm considering adopting the habit myself. What keeps us from imploding, in my mind anyway, is a sense of connection to a larger world so that even if our movements seem small we can enter into a big group hug. in moving to Austin i envisioned having a landscaped backyar...

until i'm ready to roll again stay tuned with me here on blogspot and follow at my other blog

Me and the kitties are one. Luella is a kamikaze love ball who hurls her fluffy body and tail at my face…(thanks) and then behaves as if I’m the coat check lady during the day, just some anonymous robot responsible for her lovely mink. This is the same feline who just yesterday escaped from the house as I was moving for the fourteenth time this month. Spooked by the sound of rearranged furniture she bolted out the side door running into the orange-outdoor-and-jaded cat Jack who startled by her stampede tore around the corner and under the house where my grey princess followed. Great. Luella is a lady in dire circumstances and unaccustomed to dirt is behaving normally given the situation. She doesn’t yet respond to her name which I altered when I adopted her as (yuck) ‘Celeste”. She is a pair of glassy green eyes in the dark. On my stomach I inch as far under the house as I dare carefully watching, terrified she will climb into some nook and disappear. I have visions of “Rescue 911” and...