disappearing act

have mercy

one evening last fall i had met some friends, Cat, Tom, Mike, et al... and accidentally got a little loopy drinking first, red wine, then easing into toffee flavored beers, oh yummy. i had parked my car around the corner which now seemed, to my friends, too risky to drive, whatever. "oh no, i can dribe." ...thinking i had slunk away unnoticed i made my way to the car and was just about to unlock it when i was hoisted over Mike's caveman shoulder and lugged away kicking like a baby, placed in a cab with Cat and escorted to my doorstep. upon waking the next morning i vaguely remembered that, "oh yeah, my car is three miles away." undeterred and emboldened by several espresso based drinks i walked the distance. it occurred to me in my hazy head that, "wouldn't it be funny to text Cat?" text: I'M A VERY BAD GIRL! as soon as i launch it i realize i've sent it to my cop landlord.... response: "WHAT?" like a homeless bag lady with a se...

wednesday

so tomorrow I'll be heading over to the geriatric home where I'll be {possibly} em-ceeing the evening Karaoke hour. that'll be interesting. and how did that happen you ask? well, I'm an avid eavesdropper with a keen imagination. as i wiled away time at the wholefood's cafe recently i chanced upon a gaggle of swimmers, women of various ages, whose one connection is that they religiously swim in the icy cold waters of Barton Springs 'pool'. it's no more a pool than I'm a midget but here I'm learning to let people call things what they want. for instance the street, "manor" is pronounced may-ner...and i wouldn't care except I'm the one trying to spell it out for google maps which i think is in cahoots with big oil as it keeps taking me on the most circuitous routes and i need to stop for gas every forty-five minutes. at any rate Barton Springs is as it's name suggests, a spring and an icy one. the first time i swam in it was ab...

family of foxes

so i'm paying good money to stay in this overpriced precious 'cabin' in the travis heights area of Austin. there's a small bedroom, a little bathroom with a non-stop running toilet, and then the 'kitchen-screened-in-porch' that is shared with a small fox family and a rogue squirrel. now notice what i did not mention because for the most part we assume certain things about the places we pay money to stay. there is no closet, there are no hangers, there is no place to work except the dresser vanity in the bathroom where i have my laptop hooked up. (i'm watching myself type, pretty) the screened in kitchen has gaping holes in the screening where the animal families can come through and where my two cats are plotting their escape. i spent an hour catproofing the screen so at least they can't SEE the openings....but it didn't deter the squirrel i found sitting on my kitchen table. he must have climbed down the roof. ever see a trapped squirrel trying to w...

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